50+ Funny Harry Potter Quotes That Will Make You Lol

Here are some laughable Harry Potter quotes that will give you some really funny ideas to enjoy with your friends.

Funny Quotes Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows

The deathly hallows
The deathly hallows
  1. “I don’t think you’re a waste of space.” — Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows
  2. “Every human life is worth the same and worth saving.” — Harry Potter And The Deathly Hallows
  3. “He can run faster than Severus Snape confronted with shampoo.” — Harry Potter And The Deathly Hallows
  4. “We did it, we bashed them, wee Potter’s the one, and Voldy’s gone moldy, so now let’s have fun!” — Harry Potter And The Deathly Hallows
  5. “He can move faster than Severus Snape confronted with shampoo.” —Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows.
  6. “We teachers are rather good at magic, you know.” — Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows
  7. “It is the quality of one’s convictions that determines success, not the number of followers.” — Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows
  8. “The idea of a teenage Dumbledore was simply odd, like trying to imagine a stupid Hermione or a friendly Blast-Ended Skrewt.” — Harry Potter And The Deathly Hallows
  9. Harry Potter And The Sorcerer’s Stone Funny Quotes
Harry potter quotes funny
Harry potter quotes funny
  1.  “Honestly, woman, you call yourself our mother?” — Harry Potter And The Sorcerer’s Stone
  2. “Mr. and Mrs. Dursley, of number four Privet Drive, were proud to say that they were perfectly normal, thank you very much.” — Harry Potter And The Philosopher’s Stone
  3. “It’s lucky it’s dark. I haven’t blushed so much since Madam Pomfrey told me she liked my new earmuffs.” — Harry Potter And The Sorcerer’s Stone
  4. “Welcome to a new year at Hogwarts! Before we begin our banquet, I would like to say a few words. And here they are: Nitwit! Blubber! Oddment! Tweak!” — Harry Potter And The Sorcerer’s Stone
  5. “We could all have been killed—or worse, expelled.” — Harry Potter And The Sorcerer’s Stone
  6. “What exactly is the function of a rubber duck?” — Harry Potter And The Sorcerer’s Stone
  7. “Perhaps it would be more useful if I were to transfigure Mr Potter and yourself into a pocket watch? That way, one of you might be on time.” — Harry Potter And The Sorcerer’s Stone
  8. “We’ll send you a Hogwarts toilet seat.” — Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone
  9. “The toilet’s never had anything as horrible as your head down it— it might be sick. — Harry Potter And The Sorcerer’s Stone
  10. “You’re a little scary sometimes, you know that? Brilliant … but scary.” — Harry Potter And The Sorcerer’s Stone

Short Quotes Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix 

Harry potter funny quotes
Harry potter funny quotes
  1. “The mind is not a book to be opened at will and examined at leisure.” — Harry Potter And The Order Of The Phoenix
  2. “You’re just as sane as I am.” — Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix
  3. “What’s life without a little risk?” — Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix 
  4.  “Give five signs that identify the werewolf. Excellent question…One: he’s sitting on my chair. Two: he’s wearing my clothes. Three: his name’s Remus Lupin.” — Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix
  5. “Things we lose have a way of coming back to us in the end, if not always in the way we expect.” — Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix
  6. “I think we’ve outgrown full-time education … Time to test our talents in the real world, d’you reckon?” — Harry Potter And The Order Of The Phoenix
  7. “You know, Minister, I disagree with Dumbledore on many counts … but you cannot deny he’s got style.” — Harry Potter And The Order Of The Phoenix
  8. “That’s what they should teach us here. How girls’ brains work… It would be more useful than divination, anyway…” — Harry Potter And The Order Of The Phoenix
  9. “From now on, I don’t care if my tea leaves spell, ‘Die, Ron, die,’ I’m chucking them in the bin where they belong.” — Harry Potter And The Order Of The Phoenix
  10. “Hermione: Harry, don’t go picking a row with Malfoy, don’t forget, he’s a prefect now, he could make life difficult for you. Harry: Wow, I wonder what it’d be like to have a difficult life?” — Harry Potter And The Order Of Phoenix
  11. “Don’t put your wand there, boy! … Better wizards than you have lost buttocks, you know.” — Harry Potter And The Order Of The Phoenix
  12. “Yeah, Quirrell was a great teacher. There was just that minor drawback of him having Lord Voldemort sticking out of the back of his head!” — Harry Potter And The Order Of The Phoenix

Funniest Harry Potter And The Goblet Of Fire Quotes

funny harry potter quotes
Funny harry potter quotes
  1.  “Hermione: The task is two days from now! Harry Potter: Really? I had no idea.” — Harry Potter And The Goblet Of Fire
  2.  “Percy wouldn’t notice a joke if it danced naked in front of him wearing one of Dobby’s hats.” — Harry Potter And The Goblet Of Fire
  3. “Just because it’s taken you three years to notice, Ron, doesn’t mean no one else has spotted I’m a girl!” — Harry Potter And The Goblet Of Fire

Hilarious Harry Potter And The Prisoner Of Azkaban Quotes

Harry potter quotes funny short
Harry potter quotes funny short
  1.  “Don’t let the muggles get you down.” — Harry Potter And The Prisoner Of Azkaban 
  2. “I solemnly swear I am up to no good.” — Harry Potter And The Prisoner Of Azkaban
  3. “He seems like a very good teacher, said Hermione approvingly. But I wish I could have had a turn with the boggart”. — Harry Potter And The Prisoner Of Azkaban
  4. “Why, dear boy, we don’t send wizards to Azkaban just for blowing up their aunts.” — Harry Potter And The Prisoner Of Azkaban
  5. “Happiness can be found even in the darkest of times, if one only remembers to turn on the light.” — Harry Potter And The Prisoner Of Azkaban
  6. “I solemnly swear that I am up to no good.” — Harry Potter And The Prisoner Of Azkaban
  7. “Mr. Dursley: You’re not allowed to do magic outside school. Harry: Yeah? Try me.” — Harry Potter And The Prisoner Of Azkaban

Harry Potter And The Half-Blood Prince One-Liners

The Half-Blood Prince
Harry potter quotes inspirational
  1. “How can I have hung round you for five years and not think girls are clever?” — Harry Potter And The Half-Blood Prince 
  2. “I am a wizard, not a baboon brandishing a stick.” — Harry Potter And The Half-Blood Prince
  3.  “These are mad times we live in! Mad!” — Harry Potter And The Half-Blood Prince
  4.  “Right. I’m going down to Hagrid’s.” — Harry Potter And The Half-Blood Prince
  5. “Why are you worrying about you-know-who, when you should be worrying about you-no-poo? The constipation sensation that’s gripping the nation!” — Harry Potter And The Half-Blood Prince
  6. “She questions his behaviour, and he comes up with the lame excuse, The binding is fragile. Hermione laughs. The binding is fragile? she repeats, incredulous, just as Ginny sneaks up behind him to take the book.” — Harry Potter And The Half-Blood Prince

Laughing Quotes Harry Potter And The Chamber Of Secrets

The Chamber Of Secrets

  1. “Of course, it would be difficult. And dangerous, very dangerous.” — Harry Potter And The Chamber Of Secrets
  2. “Of all the trees we could’ve hit, we had to get one that hits back.” – Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets

Read More: Funny Sunday Quotes

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