Jovial words of wisdom will surely brighten your day. Banish your worries and be happy. The day is good if you spend it with your loved ones. Find friends who are good for laughing and chatting. You have to spare some of your precious time. funny jovial quotes will be like a fragrance to your party.
1. “Everything is changing. People are taking the comedians seriously and the politicians as a joke.” —Will Rogers
2. “It’s so simple to be wise. Just think of something stupid to say and then don’t say it.” —Sam Levenson
3. “I often quote myself. It adds spice to my conversation.” —George Bernard Shaw
4. “Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died.” —Erma Bombeck
5. “Laziness is nothing more than the habit of resting before you get tired.” —Jules Renard
6. “Knowledge is like underwear. It is useful to have it, but not necessary to show it off.” —Bill Murray
7. “Whenever people agree with me I always feel I must be wrong.” —Oscar Wilde
8. “The surprising thing about young fools is how many survive to become old fools.” —Doug Larson
9. “Scandal is gossip made tedious by morality.” —Oscar Wilde
10. “Don’t be humble; you’re not that great.” —Golda Meir
11. “I live on a one-way street that’s also a dead end. I’m not sure how I got there.” — Steven Wright
12. “Talk sense to a fool and he calls you foolish.” —Euripides
13. “My problem lies in reconciling my gross habits with my net income.” —Errol Flyn
14. “Marriage is a great institution; but I am not ready for an institution yet.” —Mae West
15. “If you want to tell people the truth, make them laugh, otherwise they’ll kill you.” —Oscar Wilde
16. “Fashion is a form of ugliness so intolerable that we have to alter it every six months.” —Oscar Wilde
17. “Youth is a wonderful thing. What a crime to waste it on children.” —George Bernard Shaw
18. “My idea of an agreeable person is a person who agrees with me.” —Benjamin Disraeli
19. “In three words I can sum up everything I have learned about life: it goes on.” —Robert Frost
20. “I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by.” —Douglas Adams
21. “The secret of life is to appreciate the pleasure of being terribly, terribly deceived.” —Oscar Wilde
22. “I am an old man and have known many troubles. But most of them never happened.” —Mark Twain
23. “Blessed are the flexible, for they shall not be bent out of shape.” —Anon
24. “What is a cynic? A man who knows the price of everything and the value of nothing.” —Oscar Wilde
25. “I do not want people to be agreeable, as it saves me the trouble of liking them.” —Jane Austen
26. “Always get married in the morning. That way, if it doesn’t work out, you haven’t wasted a whole day.” —Mickey Rooney
27. “The only thing worse than being talked about, is not being talked about.” —Oscar Wilde
28. “Democracy is a device that ensures we shall be governed no better than we deserve.” —George Bernard Shaw
29. “A jury consists of twelve people chosen to decide who has the better lawyer.” —Robert Frost
30. “Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city.” —George Burns
31. “Happiness is nothing more than good health and a bad memory.” —Albert Shweitzer
32. “The trouble with the rat-race is that, even if you win, you’re still a rat.” —Lily Tomlin
33. “What’s the use of a good quotation if you can’t change it?” —Doctor Who
34. “I can resist anything but temptation.” —Oscar Wilde
35. “A lifetime of happiness! No man alive could bear it; it would be hell on earth.” —George Bernard Shaw
36. “The best way to teach your kids about taxes is by eating 30 percent of their ice cream.” —Bill Murray
37. “Where so many hours have been spent in convincing myself that I am right, is there not some reason to fear I may be wrong?” —Jane Austen
38. “I might repeat to myself slowly and soothingly a list of beautiful quotations from minds profound – if I can only remember any of the damn things.” —Dorothy Parker
39. “There are only two kinds of people who are really fascinating: people who know absolutely everything and people who know absolutely nothing.” —Oscar Wilde
40. “Martyrdom is the only way in which a man can become famous without ability.” —George Bernard Shaw
41. “I’m against a homogenized society, because I want the cream to rise.” —Robert Frost
42. “The fact that a believer is happier than a skeptic is no more to the point than the fact that a drunken man is happier than a sober one.” —George Bernard Shaw
43. “It is a truth universally acknowledged that, a single man in possession of a good fortune, must be in want of a wife. —Jane Austen
44. “Patriotism is your conviction that this country is superior to all others because you were born in it.” —George Bernard Shaw
45. “One is tempted to define man as a rational animal who always loses his temper when he is called upon to act in accordance with the dictates of reason.” —Oscar Wilde
46. “To get back my youth I would do anything in the world, except exercise, get up early, or be respectable.” —Oscar Wilde
47. “The only way to keep your health is to eat what you don’t want, drink what you don’t like, and do what you’d rather not.” —Mark Twain
48. “A lie gets halfway around the world before the truth has a chance to get its pants on.” —Winston S. Churchill
49. “It doesn’t make a difference what temperature a room is, it’s always room temperature.” —Steven Alexander Wright
50. “My marriage had it’s ups and downs like everyone’s, but when it came down to it, I knew it was solid. I miss that sort of connection with someone.” —John Scalzi
Read More: Cheerful Quotations for Laughs
